There are times when I am overwhelmed with emotion at the fact that my spending can get so far off track. Like anyone would, I get frustrated, angry, a little depressed at the future I’m throwing away and ultimately disappointed. It is no easy feat keeping an even keel with so many of life’s distractions and pressures pushing your ship of life off course. Enter my Fashion Cleanse fail and the month of March that has literally come in like a financial lion and will hopefully go out like a lamb if I can stop the monetary bleeding.
It’s my financial future and freedom from debt, why wouldn’t I want to make small sacrifices for the greater financial good? Why shouldn’t I be happy with my finances now? I’m on the right path, I should be happy.
I had the opportunity on Monday to sit down with a friend who is following his dream of becoming a life coach. He knew of the changes in my life, and the struggles I was currently having with career and finances. What interested me most was his first impressions of me, or, “the outside looking in” approach he took; I sat and wondered what on earth was holding me back in life as he told me that I looked like someone who “had it all” and “ had everything going for me”. He found it hard to understand why I was having difficulties finding that special someone and why I wasn’t working in my dream job. Hearing words like confident, enthusiastic, sincere, energetic, and charismatic made me feel as if I was experiencing déjà vu. It wasn’t the first time I’ve had people describe me this way, several friends have listed these as attributes and I encountered similar feedback in an exercise at the Dale Carnegie course I took.
Pointing the Ship in the Right Direction
Ultimately, we all know what we want in life, the greatest thing stopping us from pointing the ship in the right direction is ourselves. We get in our own way constantly, we have all this crap floating around in our head messing with our compass; our fears, our moods sabotage us and we fall prey to our weaknesses. My budgetary weakness is fashion; somehow, the rest of my budget stays in line except for that one area.
So, we tried a word association exercise to figure out if I did know what I wanted, and what I envisioned my life to be. I must admit, it worked rather well. Without hesitation, I was to give an immediate choice between two words given to me. For example: Single or Married, Working for myself or someone else, Living in Canada or abroad and so on. Within minutes, my life was painted out like a Picasso, I knew exactly what I wanted – I just lack the direction or a clear vision.
The mind is a powerful yet tricky thing. We’ve all heard of manifestation or bringing what you want in life to you. Don’t worry, I’m not going to get all hokey and Jo Jo the Psychic on you… its rather simple, what you repeat to yourself each day is what your subconscious is going to give you. Positive begets positive, negative begets negative.
I recently found this article and graphic from Pete Cashmore that I believe applies to all areas of life, including finance. The premise: Are you happy? If not change something, change a pattern in your life and do things differently.
Huh, I’m Born Again?
Keeping with Pete’s graphic of changing something; another part of the “coaching” exercise was to consider myself “born again”. No, I haven’t taken up a new religion or joined a cult. It’s about embracing life as if nothing has happened, you’re all new again, the past has no impact on today or the future. It was time I got my four-year-old enthusiasm back again, I need it!
The Prescription for Direction
We’re all looking for How-to’s, how do I get there; you’ve told me I need to change something, well, where the hell do I start?
Choose 10 Life Goals to Repeat Each Day, Twice a Day. Simple, right?
I thought so, and it was; I wrote them down quick as a bunny that evening. The tricky part is remembering to re-write them and read them each morning and each evening. Think of it as computer programming for your brain, or if you’re creative like me, web design for your brain. You’re re-designing the space in that grey matter upstairs.
I’ve slacked one day already but just like writing, you have to do a little bit each day until it becomes a habit.
What Were My 10 Goals?
- I will achieve financial freedom. Save not spend!
- I will own my own home, a small, beautiful house by the ocean.
- I will stay healthy by eating healthy meals and exercising every day.
- I will live frugally. Frugal means smart conscious spending, not being cheap.
- I will have a net worth of $8 million. Go big or go home baby!
- I will work for a creative company in fashion and design, to have a job I love doing.
- I will find my mate, a man who is fun, confident, handsome, athletic, kind and loving. (I have a few celebrity crushes to help me out with a vision for this one – dream a dream, right?)
- I will live by the ocean by 2017.
- I will live by positive thought.
- I am a successful, confident, professional businesswoman.
If we lack direction or someone (primarily ourselves) to steer our ship of life, it veers off course wildly or spins in circles, repeating the same course over and over again.
One topic I’ve never written about is compromise on this blog, I think it’s time for sacrifice and compromise to get to where I want to be.
I commit to wealth, I commit to saving, and my financial direction has now been set. Off to the stars and beyond!